OUT OF CONTROL HELPING URGES
Lynn over at Reflections in d minor has brought up another good point that made my brain go "click" when I read it:
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I am irritated by my own mistakes but I can fix those when I see them. I think a big part of the irritation with grammar and spelling mistakes is seeing something out of place and being unable to do anything about it - like seeing a painting hanging askew and automatically reaching out to straighten it.
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Now I finally understand why I feel the irritation. I never analyzed that before.
Which brings up the point of what to do with that irritation. I say, by all means, straighten the picture, but remember to wear your kid gloves when you do it. In other words, point out the error to soothe your own irritation, yes, but don't let that irritation show in the pointing.
Too often, the fixing urge is combined with a lack of understanding on the proper way to point out someone else's mistake without bruising an ego. Blustery, clumsy-mouthed folk can unintentionally cause cascades of bad feelings & recriminations. Witness Frank J going off on some "but I meant well" commenter.
Helping without hurting requires a gentle touch. If you must correct, best to do so privately (e-mail instead of comments), and with a tone suggesting that the flaw was due to error, rather than an intellectual shortcoming or moral failing.
Oh, and if you're pointing out a spelling error, don't forget to run a spell-check on your pointer :-)
Side Note:
I've been looking for an excuse to blogroll Lynn for a while. Finding this gem (as well as her taking the time to post a comment on one of my bits) was just what I needed.
Also, I finally had some time to read her front page. I discovered that, regardless of my degree of interest in the posted topic, I really enjoyed her easy, conversational writing style. There are some big blocks of text, which in lesser hands make for a hard read, but with Lynn at the keyboard, they just breeze right by.
posted by Harvey at 5:18:55 PM permalink HOME
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