NICKELS, DIMES AND A CHRONIC INABILITY TO BUDGET

Can you make a career out of a minimum wage job?

No.

But that's not what they're about. An entry level position is your chance to show that you are willing to learn, are capable of putting on a pleasant face to grouchy customers, and are willing to show up every day and on time. Do this, and promotions & pay raises follow as night the day. Meanwhile, don't buy anything that you don't ABSOLUTELY need, get your videos from the library, drive a used car, and get a roommate.

I did this myself (except for the roommate part - I had a 300 sq ft. efficiency apartment, instead), and payed my own way through college. It can be done.

Heather's reading a book written by a limosine liberal, who, while reeking of arrogant condescension, prattles on about the EEEE-VIL and OPPRESSION that's inherant in minimum wage labor, and that it's just a trap that destroys working mothers & causes homelessness. In fact, Lady-Snoots-A-Lot arrogantly ran a "scientific experiment" (which was actually neither), in which she tried to survive in the gloomy pits of low-status work.

It sounds quite nauseating to me, and I'm glad Heather took the time to read this book, because I sure as hell wouldn't be able to resist the temptation to tear the damn thing in half somewhere around page 3.

Heather's review is thorough, accurate, and a lot more even-handed that I'd be able to pull off. It's a good read, and I recommend it.

Heather's review, that is, not the book. 

RAVE REVIEW

So I stopped by Heather's Munuvian Palace of Purple, and discovered she'd gone & said the sweetest things about me. Figure I'll be able to stop blushing before I go to work tomorrow.

Note to readers: flattery will get you anything you want...

...except pictures of my boobies, so don't even ask.

BLACKFIVE SUICIDE WATCH

Would somebody please go to Matt's house and remove all the sharp objects?

SAILING

(A FILTHY LIE)

Matt was wondering if I was going to celebrate the Navy's 228th birthday. Well, I already did. In honor of the great event, I recently took a tour of my old ship, the aircraft carrier USS Enterprise.  I didn't manage to get back off before the ship left, however, so I was stuck on board for a while. The Enterprise was bound for the Persian Gulf in preparation for some F-14-style terrorist-whackin'.

As we rounded the southern tip of Africa, the captain decided that he needed some fresh ice for his tea, and we anchored of the coast of Antarctica.

While I was wandering around the frozen wasteland, awaiting our departure, I saw a sinister, yet familiar figure amidst a flock of penguins.

Harv: Evil Glenn! What are you doing here?

Evil Glenn: Dammit Currency Freak! Can't I go ANYWHERE without bumping into you?

Harv: I was just thinking the same thing... except substitute the phrase "puppy-blending, hobo-murdering, Satan-worshiping bastard."

Evil Glenn: Well, not that it's any of your business, but I'm here to film a little penguin porn.

Harv: Long way to travel just to exploit innocent wildlife. Don't you have a "special" troop of penguins at home to use for your deviant & nefarious purposes?

Evil Glenn: Well, yes, but the adult entertainment industry is hard on participants (Heh). The ladies tend to skankify pretty fast. I mean think about how hag-like Madonna's gotten.

Harv: EWWWW! I REALLY didn't need that picture in my head. But I guess I see your point. Still, it's just plain wrong to demean innocent...

Evil Glenn: Hel-LO? I had my conscience surgically removed my first year of law school. You might as well try to lay a guilt trip on Yassir Arafat. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a long list of movies that need to hit the shelves in the next couple of weeks, and I really don't have time for idle chit-chat.

Harv: What "list of movies"?

Evil Glenn: Oh, "Back Door Birdie", "Flippers of Lust", "Swimming Sluts", "Cold Feet - Hot Ass"...

Harv: That's disgusting!

Evil Glenn: "Fine Feathered Foreplay", "Flock You", "Black & White Bump & Grind", "Tux & Sucks"...

Harv: I think I'm gonna puke.

Evil Glenn: "Flappin' & Boppin'", "Freaks With Beaks", "Wings & Wangs", "Feathery Friend Felching Fun"...

Harv: Dear God! Please... Stop!

Evil Glenn: "Hot Nude Amatuer Penguin Trios", "Lay Me Instead of an Egg", "Aviary of Anal", "XXX Black Peeing Porn"...

Harv: Hey! That last one's not penguin-related.

Evil Glenn: So? I'm not allowed to have outside interests?

Harv: You pathetic, sick, twisted, degenerate monster!

Evil Glenn:...

Harv: Yeah, yeah, I know... Lawyer... Right! I'm going back to the ship, and when I get  home, I'm filing a report at HQ.

Evil Glenn: Let's not be hasty. I still need someone to play the part of the Naughty Zoo-keeper in this next scene...

Harv: Leaving now!

Evil Glenn: Come back! I can make you a star! Just bend over that snowbank and... Crap! He's gone. Oh well. Come on, Opus, we've got work to do...

The rest of the trip was uneventful, and thanks to some professional help and a lot of drinking, the mental wounds are healing nicely. I just wanted to let everyone know that a new batch of penguin porn will be on the streets soon unless the puppy-blending pervert is stopped. Meanwhile, don't buy any porn unless it's certified penguin-free.

INSTAPUNDO DELENDA EST!

TODAY'S LOVE NOTE

(Introduction)

My favorite place to be is inside of your hugs where it's warm and loving.

TODAY’S GRAFFITI CURRENCY

 
[I (heart) Christina]

While flattered by this symbol of her fan's devotion, Miss Aguilera soon decided that she would be even more flattered by a tasty McDonald's breakfast burrito.

NEW ALLIANCE ASSIGNMENT

Instapundit thinks he's so important that he can just call his blog Instapundit and not even give it a witty description in the tagline. In fact he has no tagline at all.

So it's up to the Alliance to write one for him.

This should be fun ;-)