NO MORE VOTING FOR MAYOR DALEY

As I mentioned previously, the New Blog Showcase this week has turned into a left-right pissing-by-proxy contest between 2 politically-oriented entries. The Bear has always previously allowed multiple votes for the same entry:

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The theory was that if a blogger really does mention the candidate post two or three times on their blog, then it means they feel stronger about the merit of the post than another blogger who only provides a single token link.

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But he's changed his mind, since the system was being abused. And I think he did the right thing. I mean

Irreconcilable Musings: 210 votes

Hell for Haliburton: 73 votes

all from 42 and 24 blogs respectively? That's a little too Chicago. And it detracts from the purpose of the New Blog Showcase, which is to shower attention on new bloggers who could really use some encouragement.

I, for one, applaud the Bear's decision.

MURDER MOST FOUL

So Don, of Anger Management, has this cute little story up at his place, describing how he "accidentally" ran over Miss Piggy and stood trial on Sesame Street for murder.

Oh, it's a wonderful story, full of great laughable lines, like when he asked his crappy lawyer, Cookie Monster, how much a good lawyer would cost him

“One, two, three…sorry, me can’t count that high.”

The whole thing is really funny, and I highly recommend that you read it, but be warned:

It's not true.

Sure, Miss Piggy got her Underwood spread all over the highway, and yes, Kermit played the part of the bereaved lover to the hilt ( “Piggy? Piggy?” It’s Kermit. “You killed Piggy, you [m*****f*****]!” Kermit charges me. I dive out of the way just in time to avoid a flying side kick.) , but that's only part of the story.

First, I was suspicious when Don mentioned a murder contract at the end of the story, which, conveniently, was how he beat the charges. Having watched enough Batman episodes, I know that brilliant master criminals like to drop little hints when they talk about their crimes. It makes them feel so clever to make a partial confession and not get caught. I decided to investigate my theory further. I hacked into Don's computer, and found this odd e-mail:

D.,

Pork chops tonight

K.

Curiouser & curioser.

But having no hard evidence, I decided I should pursue the only intelligent course available. I went to Madfish Willie's to tip a few & think things over.

Nothing too unusual happening. Susie was in the corner, hitting on Daniel. I didn't catch the whole conversation, but it was something like "now that I'm a real woman, maybe you can come back to my place & I'll make you a real man."

Dana wasn't drinking tonight, due to her delicate condition, but she was working the beer tub. America's #1 pin-up girl, a thin cotton T-shirt, and being in close proximity to a tub of ice... now THAT's a winning combination.

I had just sat down with Frank J, who needed some cheering up because he thinks everybody hates him, when Kermit the Frog hopped in through the door.

Ya know, for someone who had just lost his most precious love, he was lookin' pretty damn chipper. He was singin', dancin', tellin' pig jokes & just generally carrying on, as he tossed back one amphibi-tini (standard martini recipe, substitute fly for olive) after another.

Sure, maybe he was just trying to kill the pain, but I don't think so. Tell me...

DOES THIS FROG LOOK HEARTBROKEN TO YOU?

Maybe I can't prove it Don, but I think you're a cold-blooded muppet-contract-killer. I'll be keeping an eye on you.