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Saturday, January 03, 2004
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WHY ARE LIBERALS LIKE GERBILS?
Because they both eat their young.
This just fascinates me. Chris of Tao of Dowingba was a member of the Liberal Coalition, and more or less rightly so. He believes in welfare & gay marriage & social security & higher taxes & such (see the comments). But then he said this...:
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It is one of the most disturbing rituals I've seen pop up. People,
in a desperate attempt to advance Dean's* campaign, rape the names of
all the soldiers who have died in the Iraq war. "One hundred million
billion cazillion trillion fillion have died!" Some even go further and
list the individual names of each soldier who has died, or focus on one
and relate their whole life story; all in the name of advancing Dean's*
campaign.
(*This goes for some other candidates as well. Like Kerry, for instance.)
These soldiers should be honoured, not raped. These soldiers
willingly gave their lives for this cause, and now you're all using
their valiant deaths in a desperate attempt to undo all for which they
died. Right now, they died for something. If you get your way, they
died for nothing.
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...and was soon given an unceremonious boot
from the Coalition for not towing the party line. Apparently no matter
how socially liberal you are, if you support the War on Terror, then
you are persona non grata at the LC.
Although the LC was not amused (see the comments for some petty
childishness), I have to say that I'm thoroughly impressed by this line
from Chris:
I "support" a president who makes it his mission to turn a war-torn,
poverty-striken, extremely-conservative part of the world into a more
liberal democracy. Nothing anti-liberal about that.
As I've mentioned before, I can't understand why more liberals don't support the war for this reason.
Anyway, I'd like to welcome Chris to the Alliance of Free Blogs, where we don't care what he thinks of Howard Dean.
Now, about that welfare thingy...
posted by Harvey at 11:51:36 PM permalink HOME
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WHAT HE SAID
Why do I read USS Clueless? For paragraphs like this:
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As to "legitimacy", we're earning legitimacy the hard way, by
accomplishing things. We're earning it by repairing schools, and by
repairing and rebuilding infrastructure, and by delivering electric
power, and by making the streets increasingly safe from crime, and by
not retreating even though our men are being killed. One bombing attack
against the UN caused it to lift its skirts and scurry away out of the
country; but after nine months of constant attacks against us, we're
still there. That's legitimacy.
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God he makes me tingle.
posted by Harvey at 8:29:07 PM permalink HOME
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IT'S TREY'S FAULT
I swear I was going to ignore this stupid quiz. I saw it at Patterico's place during a blog-surfing accident (I went there for his Snark Hunt
entry, which link doesn't work because he's moved off Blogspot in the
month since the entry was submitted) and I put it out of my mind after
dropping a comment. So I was over at Trey's, and it reared it's ugly head and I was afraid it was going to bite if I didn't surrender myself to its warm and dark embrace, so...
You are a dedicated weblogger. You post frequently because you enjoy
weblogging a lot, yet you still manage to have a social life. You're
the best kind of weblogger. Way to go!
Oddly, although I only scored 68 out of 100 point, this puts me
right around the 90th percentile, high-scorewise. So despite this
quiz's soothing coos of normalcy, I am, in fact, more of a statistical
outlier (i.e. freak) than that D- sounding grade would suggest.
Beloved Wife is just going to nod smugly when she reads this.
By the way... have I ever started a meme?
posted by Harvey at 7:55:23 PM permalink HOME
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STUPID, TIME-WASTING FOOD
I'm with Trey on this one. Most of the time, I find eating to be more of a bother than a pleasure. I'd rather be reading, blogging, or having unnatural sex with my wife than waste time taking in sustenance.
But that's not why I'm linking the post. I'm linking it because I giggled like an idiot when I read this line:
Update: I decided that eating is really for the best, so I made
a pot pie. I've not had pot pie in a long time and this one smells like
a cat. Is that normal?
Maybe I'm just tired. I think I'll go take a nap now.
posted by Harvey at 5:03:34 PM permalink HOME
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SNARK IS BACK
Battling back from a series of personal disasters, Venomous Kate has posted the long-awaited Hunting of the Snark round-up. While there, I found out that Jess of Appropos of Something doesn't like those "What are you" quizzes
that seem so ubiquitous. Mostly I just ignore them, myself, since they
rarely offer anything particularly insightful. However, he provided a
link to Sugarmama who has a whole host of blogging likes & dislikes.
This is worth a read for both blog readers & blog writers. You may
not agree with everything, but it will provide you some food for
thought.
My big "Amens" got to:
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Light text on a dark background. Ouch, ouch! It hurts my eyes!
"Boohoo. Nobody reads my blog." This isn't entirely annoying,
unless the person posts once a month. Then it doesn't make sense to me.
It's true that few people read blogs that are infrequently updated.
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She's right, you know. If you want more readers, post more often. Period.
Oh... and there's that one hideous shade of eye-searing electric red the should NEVER, EVER BE USED FOR ANYTHING AT ANYTIME ON ANY WEB PAGE. (Click at your own risk. You were warned).
posted by Harvey at 4:41:53 PM permalink HOME
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SINGLE WHITE MALE, ACCENT ON THE WHITE
Joey of Single White Male has a new place, and even has a good post up
with working permalinks. Being the tender age of 18 he makes this
observation:
In our classrooms at school they broadcast 'Channel 1' everyday. And no one ever watches it.
But once, not too long ago, I looked up and caught a glimpse of a report they were doing from Iraq.
And I realized that if you took the boy that was on the screen,
changed him out of his military garb and into some jeans and a T-shirt,
then stuck him in that classroom with me, nobody would notice a thing.
and goes on to give some very touching and heartfelt thanks to the boys in uniform:
Ya know, I can't help but think that maybe he's right - the best way to thank them is to learn how to play tennis.
I'm going to leave his Blogspot permalink in my blogroll until he's all
moved in. Or until I get tired of having to click twice to read his
stuff. Whichever comes first.
posted by Harvey at 3:44:59 PM permalink HOME
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JUST PUT YOUR HEAD IN THIS LITTLE NOOSE...
As part of my King of the Blogs Judge duties, I am to review the answers to this week's Host's Challenge Question:
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We all know flattery works, well it does at the King of the Blog
Tournament also. Your job is to write an advertising piece that
includes reasons to visit each of the judges and the host, and why you
feel as King of the Blogs you can help them each get more hits and
readers. Also pointing out why your worthy adversaries are not able to
do this would be advised.
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The entrants' answers can be found here. These are simply my reviews. I'm omitting the scores to increase the suspense.
ChristWeb
Good points: Managed to link everyone once and made some promises.
Probably trustworthy to deliver on them, being Christiany & all.
Bad points: Only 1 link per judge. Didn't mention blogger names. Gave
no compelling reason to click the links. Text was dryer than a Bob Dole
campaign speech. Please review my "How to Drive Traffic" post.
Walking Stick
Good points: Egotistical with bouts of moderate insanity
Bad points: Where's my link?
Wolf Who Sends Flowers
Good points: Extra points for creativity above and beyond the call of
duty. Links galore, and ass-kissing the likes of which usually runs me
about $50. Sweet & tasty. Obviously did a LOT of homework for this
post.
Bad points: None visible. Well, Foxgirl did forget to include naked pictures, but that's a non-deductible offense.
Smarter Cop
Good points: I'm a sucker for poetry. A lot of thoughtful, creative
effort went into this one. Nice finesse on working Evangelical
Outpost's hyperpolysyllabic name into the poem.
Bad points: Some forced rhymes & a few awkward rhythms, but not too
bad, considering the material. Had the misfortune of having to compete
against Foxy's epic.
Vigilance Matters (Current King of the Blogs)
Good points: Cocky, annoying arrogance. Always a plus in a monarch.
Good effort on keeping with a theme - nice storytelling and/or
butt-kissing
Bad points: I'm still not sure how my bloody death at the hands of the Yahoo-ite barbarians will increase my site traffic.
Dodgeblogium
Good points: Answered the question
Bad points: Only answered the question. No style points here. Reads like an autopsy report, albeit a polite one.
And as a general comment to all entrants, I'm surprised no one thought to link individual entries on the judges' blogs, thereby demonstrating the entrant's traffic-driving abilities.
posted by Harvey at 3:05:30 PM permalink HOME
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THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARILY DRUNKEN GENTLEMEN
The Bartender's latest project is handing out medals for various & sundry accomplishments in the arena of drinking:
Royal Order of the 86 - Awarded for aggressively assaulting the patience of the most tolerant
of bartenders; for never being so sober he can’t get into a scuffle
with a blind Buddhist...
Blackout Brigade Medal of Merit - Long after lesser drunks have staggered off to bed, these valorous
boozers shout: “Yes, I will have another double shot of tequila!” and
gallantly lurch into the inky blackness of oblivion...
Beer Goggles of Gallantry - In the face of facial warts, extreme obesity, general hideousness and severe damage to their reputations...
Tavern Defense Campaign Medal - The first line of defense against winos, tourists, weekend-warriors and
slumming yuppies, the recipients of this medal man the barstools that
are the trenches of every pub...
More to come, so keep checking Madfish Willie's Cyber Saloon.
Frankly, I find these babies more impressive than my good conduct medal. What's a GCM,
you ask? It's awarded for "faithful, zealous, and obediant service" in
the Navy. Sometimes referred to as the St. Bernard medal, since it
means you've been a good doggie. It's also referred to as the Never
Been Caught medal, since basically the only thing you need to do
to earn it is not get brought up before the Captain for a UCMJ violation.
Anyway, I think I should be awarded the Tavern Defense Campaign Medal for leading the Bartender's rescue mission. I'll just submit the form and see what happens...
posted by Harvey at 1:34:18 PM permalink HOME
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Last update: 6/24/2005; 7:39:18 PM.
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