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Tuesday, January 20, 2004
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WAR ON TERROR: THE PERKS
There are a lot of good things that have come from prosecuting the War
on Terror, the biggest of which is, well, lots of dead terrorists. But
there are several side benefits as well. Here's my Top 10:
10) Sales of "War on Terror: To Do List" T-shirts skyrocket, spurring a rapid economic recovery.
9) More oil for blood. Terrorist blood, that is.
8) Lavish and exotic ashtrays for American soldiers.
7) Filthy hippies skip college classes to attend protests, allowing
serious students to learn in an atmosphere free from eye-wateringly
noxious odors and choruses of "is this going to be on the test?"
6) The French finally got around to producing their own color-coded terror threat level warnings.
5) GrouchyMedia videos
4) That defeated look on Dan Rather's face when the statue fell.
3) Hey, cool! The latest copy of Surrender Monkeys Monthly just hit the stands!
2) How about a little fire, Scarecrow?
and the #1 side benefit to the War on Terror:
1) American kids improve their geography skills; learn that "between the Tigris and Euphrates" is not a euphemism for "vagina".
SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS!
posted by Harvey at 8:15:20 PM permalink HOME
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TODAY'S LOVE NOTE
(Introduction)
I PROMISE YOU
To be with you each night
watching it slip into each new day
the sun brings the promise
of my devotion in every way.
To watch the years
blend into years
being the keeper of your dreams
the conqueror of your fears.
To have you feel the passion
only hearts in love can feel
from this moment on
proving my love is real.
I will give my love freely
in everything we do
spending the rest of my lifetime
whispering words of love to you
No more broken hearts
or unhappy memories
never any fallen tears
where smiles should be...
posted by Harvey at 7:39:30 PM permalink HOME
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TODAY’S GRAFFITI
CURRENCY
Embittered by their inability to regain sponsorship of the New Blog
Showcase, the League of Liberals vent their wrath on N.Z Bear by
encasing him in carbonite and having him flown to Jabba the Hut's
headquarters in Finland.
posted by Harvey at 7:35:46 PM permalink HOME
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KING OF THE BLOGS HANGS 3, SURVIVORS REGROUP
At the end of the first week, the results have been finalized, and the following blogs are advancing to the next round:
Blown Fuse (new home here)
Cranial Cavity
Vessel of Honour
Which means that:
Hobson's Choice
Canadian Comment
and even the current King of the Blogs, ChristWeb
are being sent home to cry themselves to sleep. Better luck next time, fellas.
As usual, my witty and entertaining reviews can be found at the King of the Blogs web site. I also have to say that Dawn of Clarified put on a really nice show with her reviews, too. For example:
Blown Fuse: because I love you. I was expecting something very
different after reading the title. I mean, if you really loved me you
would have told me how I can get a weekly massage for free at a really
trendy spa or given me the online code for 50 percent off coupons to
Ann Taylor...electrical sockets installation ranks waaaaaaaay down the
list. But, it's a nice gesture for the most handily-inclined of us and
your point about paying others to do what you can do yourself is an
excellent one for us to remember, so I give it a 7 and know that martha
stewart would be proud.
Nice one, Dawn.
posted by Harvey at 7:21:05 PM permalink HOME
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HOW TO DO IT RIGHT
Amongst my reviews at the King of the Blogs Tournament,
I mentioned that it's good to comment on the idiocy of the RIAA, but
when making the point, the "how you make it" is important:
ChristWeb: "Downloading Music is Just the Symptom"
Good points: Well-written, intelligently phrased, informative. Good point on music customers being resentful of high CD prices.
Bad points: Missed an important
possible explanation for the drop in downloading - because of the
lawsuits, the people answering the surveys are lying and saying they
don't download anymore because they don't want to be sued. Also,
Stephen got off-topic a bit when he discussed the low quality
performers in popular music. Yes, Britney sucks, but is he suggesting
that
Britney's complete lack of talent
was a root cause of massive copyright infringement, just like high CD
prices were? This piece didn't quite hang together right.
Score: 8
Linus at Pepper of the Earth puts it much better.
If you thought the trouble with
the modern music business stemmed from piratical digital downloading,
you bought a bad line sold by an increasingly-notorious and ruthless
bunch of lobbyists pretending to be advocates of rights and propriety.
The problem never really had much to do with those squawky mp3's and
broadband campus lines. It was the usual trouble endemic to our current
incarnation of vicious slash-and-burn capitalism, and had to do with
opportunism and money-grubbing. When ruthless execs flog finance out of
a horse that's been getting sicker by the decade, and nobody bothers to
feed the horse (why waste money on all that expensive food?),
eventually the horse is going to vomit up blood and keel over. At this
point the execs cluster around the corpse, look serious, clasp their
hands behind their backs, and sagely say, "It's downloading did this.
Damn shame. Those thieves need to be taught a lesson." Um, right.
My GOD how I love that mental image.
Genius, Linus, genius.
Look for yourself on my blogroll.
posted by Harvey at 6:47:36 PM permalink HOME
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GEEK GOODIES
Time for physicsgeek voter linky-love.
Lots of goodies in this roundup. Naturally the one that catches my eye is this currency related item.
Seems that the USA Network's new series "Traffic" is being advertised
with stickers on $1 bills. Can anyone get me a picture of a circulated
one? Linus?
He also directs us to Right Wing News, where Mr. Hawkins holds forth on... lets be euphemistic and call it an intriguing idea for body modification.
cchaffie: "Does anyone know a
surgeon or how to get a surgeon to amputate healthy toes? I will pay
good money to have 4 of my toes removed. Any ideas are appreciated."
Reading that blackened my soul. I must bathe now.
posted by Harvey at 6:38:22 PM permalink HOME
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© Copyright 2005 Harvey Olson.
Last update: 6/24/2005; 7:44:43 PM.
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